All of these sensations are just making you feel so vulnerable, and you’re staring at the dude (well depending on the position) and you usually feel some warm and fuzzies towards them. You’re making noises you didn’t even know existed and the whole thing is just blowing your mind. When he starts to really fuck you, it gets very overwhelming. You have little control over it, which makes the experience even hotter. When a penis enters your ass, a moan involuntarily escapes your lips. they’re acting”? I can’t be for sure obviously but I don’t think they are. You know how when you watch people getting fucked in gay porn, there’s all this moaning, and you’re just like, “yeah, right. The unnatural feeling enhances the pleasure. Funnily enough though, that’s how you derive a lot of enjoyment from it. I mean, it just literally feels unnatural because you’re using an exit as an entrance. I don’t mean that in a moralistic or bad way. It’s hard to explain but the whole thing just feels wrong. When he goes in, it’s going to feel strange at first. Hopefully his dong won’t be too huge either because that can become difficult to manage. It will seem like I’ve magically gained 20 pounds somewhere for no real reason so this guy needs to be understanding of everything. I’m going to be getting in sexual positions where my body will look fleshy and revolting.
It’s imperative that the guy who’s going to be penetrating me is trustworthy and gentle, and not an asshole. You don’t want to go into the experience feeling insecure about the state of your ass so be thorough in your examination.įast forward to the main event. While loosening things up, take this opportunity to clean things up. You don’t want it to be too tight because then it runs the risk of being very painful. I’ll be mortified if you-know-what happens!” After chilling your asshole out, you kind of need to go in the shower and fuck yourself with your finger. And don’t try any funny business tonight. When that’s done, I’l give a pep talk to my asshole and be like, “Hey babe! I know you’ve been in retirement or whatever, but you need to get ready because something’s coming to an orifice near you. I can then have the luxury of choosing “Attending”, “Maybe Attending” or “Not Attending.” If I choose to attend, I need to start doing some serious yoga to Sade or Enya. The guy needs to send me a private Facebok event invitation titled, “Ryan O’Connell gets fucked in the ass.” with a set date and time. If I’m getting fucked in the ass, I need to know way in advance so I can prepare properly. First of all, anal sex cannot be an on-the-fly decision. I’m going to try to put the feeling of anal sex into words so you can get an idea of how crazysexyintense it is.
Anal is like the oxygen they need to breathe. With others, however, it’s like throwing a hot dog down a hallway. Some only have anal sex in monogamous relationships and consider oral sex to be intercourse. But this is something the gay community doesn’t always see ass-to-ass on. Entrance is only granted to V.I.P.’s-Very Important Penises. The act is so intense and delicate that I could never give my asshole to just anybody. When my friends tell me stories about doing it with some random they met at a bar, I’m completely stunned. Anal sex is kind of the biggest deal ever. If Jersey Shore has “Gym, Tan, Laundry”, gay men have “Gym, Tan, Anal.” As I’ve discussed before, the male equivalent of a G-spot rests in our prostate so the incentive to get someone’s dick in our ass ASAPular is that much greater.īut here’s some real talk for you. Lesbians use dildos, straight girls get drunk and acquiesce to their boyfriend’s requests, and gay guys, well, we sort of invented anal sex. The only people who aren’t getting fucked in the ass are straight men.
It’s like, “You just let me put my penis in your ass and move it in and out for an hour. After the deed, you see your fellow man in a whole new empathetic light, the kind of light that’s humanizing, curbs any further judgements and could possibly end wars. Getting your ass penetrated should be a prerequisite for life because it’s an experience that teaches humility and encourages teamwork.